EX · Black. The classic.
Original
“He said you were too much. We think you're not enough.”
Straight black coffee. No apology.
Protein coffee · A break-up kit in a can
EX.
Coffeethatmakesyourexregretleaving.30gprotein.Zerocontact.Fullglow-up.
30g PROTEIN0g CONTACTNEWEX ORIGINALEX VANILLAEX DOUBLE SHOTEX DECAFCOFFEE THAT MAKES YOUR EX REGRET LEAVING30g PROTEIN0g CONTACTNEWEX ORIGINALEX VANILLAEX DOUBLE SHOTEX DECAFCOFFEE THAT MAKES YOUR EX REGRET LEAVING
Four moods. One project: you.
Pick your
closure.
Every can is a break-up kit. You don't drink it because you need caffeine — you drink it because Monday's coming and you need to look like you spent the weekend becoming a better person. (You did. You drank EX.)
EX · Creamy.
Vanilla
“Sweet. But not for him.”
Madagascar vanilla. Calibrated softness.
EX · Double caffeine. Double protein.
Double Shot
“For the day you run into him by accident.”
2x espresso. 60g protein. No hostages.
EX · Yes, decaf. That's the joke.
Decaf
“You don't need stimulants anymore. You are the stimulant.”
All the character. None of the jitters.
The lineup
The whole crew.
Four moods. One bad decision he made. We made it into a product line.
How it works
Three steps.
Zero text backs.
01
The text arrives.
"u up?" or something equally bleak. You consider responding. Don't.
02
The hand moves.
Block. Delete. Open fridge. Crack an EX. The body knows before the brain catches up.
03
The glow-up compounds.
Six months later you've got visible obliques, a new job, and his mutual followed you. We did our part.
The manifesto
EX isn't a drink.
It's the next version of you.
Every other brand in this aisle talks macros, clean ingredients, sustained energy — same words, same beige can, same sans-serif. We don't care about any of that. We care about the moment you decide to become someone he'll hear about later.
EX is friendly-aggressive, like a trainer who likes you but won't let you off easy. Never mean to you. Always mean to him. You're the main character. He's the guy who missed it.
The name has a second floor: EX is also the person you used to be. The old version. The one who stayed on read. We're not here to help you hate your ex — we're here to help you be the next you.
Drink it. Lift something. Don't text back.
Out of home
One line.
One can.
One message.
Black background. Can in the middle. One sentence. If it needs a second line, it's not honest enough yet.
EX · 0011
Block him. Drink this.
Protein coffee · 250mlEX · 0012
Character development in a can.
Protein coffee · 250mlEX · 0013
He underestimated you. We didn't.
Protein coffee · 250mlEX · 0014
30g protein. 0g contact.
Protein coffee · 250mlEX · 0015
You were never the problem. But you were never this defined either.
Protein coffee · 250mlEX · 0016
Closure is a flavor.
Protein coffee · 250mlEX · 0017
Petty, but make it macros.
Protein coffee · 250mlEX · 0018
Your glow-up. Our fault.
Protein coffee · 250ml0g
Protein per can
0mg
Caffeine · Original
0g
Contact
0
Flavors of closure
As seen in
Vogue—“The most emotionally intelligent beverage of the year.”GQ—“A rebrand for the reformed fuckboy.”Men's Health—“30 grams of protein. Zero grams of cope.”Highsnobiety—“Coffee with taste, for once.”Monocle—“Petty, but beautifully made.”Women's Health—“The break-up kit we didn't know we needed.”Vogue—“The most emotionally intelligent beverage of the year.”GQ—“A rebrand for the reformed fuckboy.”Men's Health—“30 grams of protein. Zero grams of cope.”Highsnobiety—“Coffee with taste, for once.”Monocle—“Petty, but beautifully made.”Women's Health—“The break-up kit we didn't know we needed.”
For creators
We don't do discount codes.
We do break-up codes.
At checkout, type a phrase you should've said months ago. If it hits, you get 10% off and we ship overnight. Petty, but make it conversion.
Apply to partnerSCHLUSSMACHEN10
DONE4EVER
NOTYOURTYPE
DELETEHIM
GLOWUP247
KEEPITMOVING
Questions he didn't ask
FAQ.
Is this actually about my ex?+
It's about whoever underestimated you. Ex-partner, ex-boss, ex-version of you. Pick one.
What's in it?+
Cold brew, 30g whey isolate, a little sweetener, zero seed oils, no nonsense. Full nutrition panel on the can.
Will I actually get shredded?+
We do protein, caffeine and an opinion. The rest is on you.
Is decaf a joke?+
Yes and no. It's a real product and an obvious bit. Both can be true.
Where do I get it?+
DTC first. Gyms, selected cafés and a handful of stores after launch. Subscribe to the list — we'll text you.
BEEX.
Enter your email. We'll send you one can, one discount, and zero reasons to look back.